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Updated at: 2024-05-25 17:12:24 (1 year ago by SW - Melkisedeck Shine)
JAMAA: Baba Padri nimekuja kuungama PADRI: Haya JAMAA: Niliiba kamba PADRI: Kamba? JAMAA: Ndio, kamba lakini kule mwisho kulikuwa kumefungwa ng'ombe PADRI: Kwa hiyo uliiba ng'ombe? JAMAA: Kiukweli nilikuwa nina lengo la kuiba kamba, kwa bahati mbaya mwisho kulikuwa na ng'ombe PADRI: Mi naona mueleze Mungu direct, mi sikuelewi kabisaaa
Updated at: 2024-05-25 17:46:22 (1 year ago by SW - Melkisedeck Shine)
Mtalii: Do you have vegetables here. Mtafsiri: Mnavyo vijimeza hapa. Waiter: Vijimeza vidogo hatuna. Mtafsiri: No sir, they don't have. Mtalii: OK, fine, do you have hot dogs. Mtafsiri: Sawa, je mnao mbwa wa moto. Waiter: Loh! Bwana we, hatupiki mbwa hapa. Mtafsiri: They don't cook here Mtalii: What type of snacks do you have here. Mtafsiri: Aina ngapi ya nyoka mnao hapa, Waiter: We bwana we hapa hatupiki aina yeyote ya nyoka, mwache akale nyumbani kwao. Mtafsiri: They don't cook any type of snacks here, maybe you can go back and eat at home. Mtalii: OK, at least give us a cocktail juice. Mtafsiri: OK, tupatie hata juisi ya mkia wa jogoo. Waiter: Hebu tokeni na bangi zenu hapa, tena sasa hivi kabla sijakasirika. Mtafsiri: Lets get out of here 😝😝😝😂😂😂 Usicheke pekeyako
Updated at: 2024-05-25 17:11:24 (1 year ago by SW - Melkisedeck Shine)
Kuna siku nilichalala kipesa nikaamua kuomba dem wangu aniazime 10,000/= akanipa. Baada ya siku mbili nikapata pesa zaidi ya laki nne hivi, nikaamua kumpa 100,000/= mpenzi wangu bila yeye kuniomba. Baada ya siku 3 akaja kuniambia:- "Bae, ile 10,000/- niliyokuazima mwenyewe amekuja kunidai, so kama unayo naomba unipe nimrudishie maana ananisumbua leo siku ya 3." SAA HIZI NIPO ZANGU SINGLE NATAFUTA DEM MWINGINE
Kilichotokea baada ya kichaa kumfumania mke wake na mwanamme mwingine
Jay akaruhusiwa kwenda nyumbani kutoka hospital ya Vichaa, akapakiwa ktk ambulance hadi karibu na nyumbani kwake, akaulizwa unapakumbuka? akajibu ndio nyumba yangu ileee, mara wakatoka watoto wawili wamevaa uniform akasema
Updated at: 2024-05-25 18:01:23 (1 year ago by SW - Melkisedeck Shine)
Jay akaruhusiwa kwenda nyumbani kutoka hospital ya Vichaa, akapakiwa ktk ambulance hadi karibu na nyumbani kwake, akaulizwa unapakumbuka? akajibu ndio nyumba yangu ileee, mara wakatoka watoto wawili wamevaa uniform akasema watoto wangu walee wanakwenda shule.. akatoka mwanamke akasema na mke wangu yulee, ghafla akatoka mwanaume Jay akasema na mimi yule naenda kazini. hivi Jay kweli kapona?
Updated at: 2024-05-25 17:10:41 (1 year ago by SW - Melkisedeck Shine)
Tulikua kwa basi tunaelekea arusha,ile namcheki dereva kumbe ni best yangu na basi ilikua kwenye spidi hatari, nikaenda kumziba macho nkamuuliza otea mi ni nani, kabla hajanijibu nikasikia kishindo kikubwa sana NA SASA HIVI NIMEZINDUKA NIMEONA ABIRIA WOTE TUPO WODI NAMBA 3 HAPA KCMC MOSHI. 🤕🤕🤕🤕 SODA ZA WAGONJWA PLIIIZ!!! 🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏
Huyu mke kwa kupenda hela! Cheki anachomwambia mume wake
Jamaa karudi toka kazini mpole na hana furaha!
MKE; Vipi leo mbona mpole?
MUME; Ofisi yetu imeungua na watu wote waliokuwemo wamekufa.
MKE; Ilikuaje wewe ukapona?
Updated at: 2024-05-25 18:02:40 (1 year ago by SW - Melkisedeck Shine)
Jamaa karudi toka kazini mpole na hana furaha!
MKE; Vipi leo mbona mpole?
MUME; Ofisi yetu imeungua na watu wote waliokuwemo wamekufa.
MKE; Ilikuaje wewe ukapona?
MUME; Nilikua chooni jirani na ofisi najisaidia.
MKE; Loh maskini, familia zao itakuaje?
MUME; Watalipwa million 100 kila mfiwa.
MKE; KWA HASIRA, Ona sasa na wewe kunya kunya kwako umetukosesha mihela.. Ungeenda kunya akhera.
Updated at: 2024-05-25 17:01:44 (1 year ago by SW - Melkisedeck Shine)
Mke: Unampango gani na pasaka hii mmewangu.. Mume: Nitafanya kama yesu.. Mke: Unamaanisha Nini?
Mume: Nitaondoka ijumaa na Kurudi j3.. Mke: Unanishangaza, kama utafanya hivi nami nitafanya kama Maria.. Mume: Unamaanisha Nini? Mke: Nitapata mimba bila ya kuingingiliwa na wewe mume wangu.. Mume: 😳😳😳
Cha kufanya msichana akikukimbia halafu atake kukurudia
Updated at: 2024-05-25 17:05:23 (1 year ago by SW - Melkisedeck Shine)
……… Kama msichana atakutupa kwa sababu huna pesa, na baadaye unapopata pesa akarudi tena kuomba msamaha… Ndugu yangu….. Msamehe…. Mpe ahadi ya ndoa, mwambie utamuoa…. iambie familia yake unataka kufanya ukarabati wa nyumba yao…… Ondoa paa lote la nyumba yao halafu TOWEKA…..
